Black Cat In A Mailbox

Mailbox

So now that my husband Picasso’s waiver was approved, everything’s cool, right?

The U.S. immigration system works as smoothly as a newborn’s baby’s bottom, right?

Wrong.

I’m choosing to speak in more detail about this process, a process that my husband and I are in the very middle of right now, because I want you to keep these details in mind as you think about Comprehensive Immigration Reform as well as the U.S. immigration system as it stands now.

We turned in our DS-260 form electronically last week. It supposedly takes 3-5 business days to process. After it’s processed, I could call to set up the permanent residency appointment for Picasso. That’s where the yes or no will go down.

I’ve been calling since last week. Every representative that I spoke with on the other end of the magical appointment number that I dialed told me that I had to wait until the DS-260 was officially processed, and then I could schedule the appointment.

Well, apparently the DS-260 was processed yesterday. But…I couldn’t just schedule the appointment as promised.

I was informed by an extremely rude representative (who I’ll call Rudy) on the other end that I could not schedule the appointment without the instruction sheet.

Instruction sheet? But the other reps told me that once the DS-260 was processed, that was it.

Apparently not. There was an instruction sheet that Rudy told me was sent to me and our lawyer in the States, and my husband in Mexico. I tried every which way til Tuesday to get an appointment set, but Rudy wasn’t budging.

Due to the fact that my husband and I have the privilege of an excellent lawyer, she called the magical appointment number and took on Round 2 of getting a permanent residency appointment set for my husband.

Her representative was someone I’ll call Hal, because he truly was a robot. Hal told our lawyer that only one instruction letter was sent, and it was sent to me – completely conflicting with the information that Rudy told me on my call not 15 minutes before. However, the letter was sent to a previous address in New York. I now live on the West Coast, clear across the country. We had previously been told by the powers that be that my address would be updated automatically with the DS-260, so there was no need to make any individual updates.

When our lawyer asked Hal what to do, Hal answered that I needed to go to New York to pick up the letter.

I was wish that I was kidding.

Hal denied our lawyer’s repeated attempts to speak with a supervisor. After 20 minutes, where Hal almost seem to chant certain phrases over and over as if they were a mantra, Hal put our lawyer on hold and checked with his supervisor. Hal got back on the line and said permission was granted for a copy of the instruction letter sent to her.

Our lawyer has the full power and permission under U.S. law to be our legal representative. She asked Hal to be told the contents of the instruction letter. Hal denied her request.

Our lawyer doesn’t know why we have to wait for an instruction sheet. She’s never had clients who needed to wait for an instruction sheet.

At this point, that instruction sheet had better pop up and give my lawyer a foot massage once she opens it. And I’ll start placing bets with all of you if an instruction sheet really does arrive to my previous address in New York.

And if that same instruction sheet does arrive to my husband in Mexico? Well, I’ll declare a national holiday if it arrives, because me and the Mexican postal system haven’t always had the best of relationships.

I’m now the black cat in the above picture, staring out from the inside of a green metal mailbox.

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4 thoughts on “Black Cat In A Mailbox

  1. Haha, seriously I like the part when he tells you to go to New York & pick the letter up!! I know your not lying because we deal with those people all the time, es una LOCURA!! You gotta laugh because there is nothing else you can do!!

  2. Truth much stranger than fiction! You *really* could not make this stuff up. Thanks for sharing and we send many wishes for calm. N & J

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